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Monday, August 3, 2020
Opening sentence for my story
Kia Ora everyone, W.A.L.T write an interesting first sentence to hook our reader. My first sentence was " one day a boy was playing on his Xbox." This is my improved sentence "pewpewpewh A boy was playing video games in a dark gloomy room." I think my updated sentence is better than my first sentence. Here are my sentence's 
Great work Lily.
ReplyDeleteI always enjoy looking at the children's blogs.You have made the sentence have a bit of extra 'pop'.
Maybe next time you could put your exciting sentence in the box beside the boring sentence.It would save the reader having to go back up and look at the sentence starter.
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